“Before you dive into my waters, you should know I love deep.” ~ Betty Larrea
I am often asked by people—who were in the beginning phases of a relationship or already deeply committed to another person—why the other person walked away and gave up on the relationship.
There are no easy answers, nor are they ever the same. We all choose to walk away from things for a variety of reasons, which are personal to us. But I am a big believer in soul connections and that nothing is a coincidence in life, so I believe that each of those relationships was meant to be something for both parties involved.
One of my spiritual mentors calls the walking away from a relationship a “forfeiture.” It’s when the universe, God, or whatever you believe in brings two people together with the intention and hope that they will take the opportunity to create something together—and then one person withdraws prematurely.
It was not an accident or blind chance that we’ve met.
That person was brought to us because we were asking for what they had to offer in some way, whether it was through prayers, through the energy we were sending out or even through our thoughts, which we may have never verbalized to anyone.
But sometimes we don’t recognize what it is or what it’s meant to be right away and we give up on it too soon. Maybe it looked different than we thought it should. Maybe it was taking too long to get off the ground, and we lost interest and patience. Maybe we were going to have to put a little work into it to create what we wanted, and in today’s world most of us don’t want to have to work at anything…especially a relationship. We want and expect it to be easy.
So in turn, without even realizing it, we “forfeit” the opportunity given to us to create something we actually wanted. And that’s our choice. We can move on and tell ourselves, “It just wasn’t meant to be.”
But for the person who didn’t forfeit and throw in the towel prematurely, the challenge is to not personalize it and make it about us. Although it’s incredibly difficult to not feel rejected, it’s important that we understand it truly isn’t about us but about the other person’s readiness and willingness to meet us where we are.